I have attracted a lot of attention to this blog, mainly because of the way I write it. I didn't know what was going on online and in my work environment until I was finally told by someone who has known me for a long time.
As you know, I have had a few over-critical comments made on my postings (some, to be fair were just badly worded and I did think them over). I have also had a few problems at work as a result of this blog and the way I appear to be to others (possibly because they make assumptions about me as a result of my writing).
I have discovered just how much blogging is loathed in the profession. All except one site is berated at some point by 'professional' colleagues who just can't stand the idea of anyone writing down what they have done during a shift. Fair enough but it is an exercise in free speech. Nevertheless, I have also discovered how much I have offended a few people as a result of the style of writing I have. I have had a look at my earlier postings and I can see what the fuss is about. I do sometimes come across as arrogant and self-serving. Someone has the impression that I don't like EMT's (Techs) and that I cannot understand. I am an EMT with a bag surely? Most of my friends are EMT's.
So I have put the record straight on 'their' site and I am doing it here because you all need to know that writing about this job is a very tricky thing to do and it has profoundly affected my work environment. I confess to being a little less than careful about my wording at the beginning and so I have steadily developed another style of writing (you may have noticed). I have been pulled up for being too graphic and I am no longer willing to write about my experiences in such detail (I will do that in my private reflections). Graphic details may offend someone involved or who has had a similar experience.
I will no longer refer to myself in terms that isolate EMT's to a lower level, which I never intended to do and never even noticed (neither did my readers). When I referred to me being the paramedic on a job or having to take over that was not a deliberate attempt to make EMT's look bad or beneath me. I see no difference except that I have to do certain things in certain situations and have to be damn careful about my registration.
As for deleting comments, well some of them just can't be published! I never as much as leave the thumb print of profanity on my site. Not that I don't swear, of course I do, just not much. It's a poor use of the English language I think. The main reason I keep my site so clean is that children read it with interest; I know this because of past comments made by their parents and so I will not tolerate the use of foul and offensive language.
I read a book years ago called 'Blue lights and bandages'. It was written by a man who had served over 30 years in the ambulance service in Scotland. It was a very graphic and revealing book and it was about real people. It helped me make up my mind about becoming a Paramedic and I didn't find it in the least embarrassing or offensive. I saw it for what it was. I began writing this blog, without knowledge of any other of its kind, with that book in mind. What I didn't know and have had to learn, is that people in this business do not want to read about it and that a few will do the worst that they can in order to gag you. This has been a shocking lesson for me because I wandered into this place thinking it was full of like-minded people. Even at my age, I was naive. I was writing it for YOU not them.
I am now more aware of how I interact with my colleagues and will be a lot more careful about how I behave. Not because I have been bullied into it - I don't respond to that rubbish. I am doing this because I am part of a very large team and I need to respect the rules of the game, even if my whole life has been conditioned in the opposite direction. I'm adapting, that's what I am doing. All it took was someone to tell me man-to-man what was going on. I respond well to being spoken to like a grown up.
This blog will continue because a LOT of people read it. You don't say much but I think that's because you like to read it more than comment on it. In any case, your kind and supportive comments alone are enough to draw the fire of the few. Can't win, right?
I am on nights soon and you know how much I like them...