Scruffs is standing for election on June 4th (MEP Scruffy) and I want you to give him your support. Simply let me know if you would vote for him (please feel free to include all members of your family).
If he gets enough support, he pledges to abolish all MP expenses and to talk to the local North Korean cats to see if he can dissuade them from launching pre-emptive kitty-litter strikes at the South. He will also increase the state pension and give all Veterans free travel throughout the UK, free gas and electricity and respect from every spotty teenager in the country.
Go on...vote for him; you know you have to!